A month ago I bought my grandson a book called That’s Good! That’s Bad by Margaret Cuyler and David Catrow.   It’s essentially the “Is That So?” story about the back and forth that happens in our world, and how we meet it.  It’s about perception.

Today we got a call from the physicians that our grandson needed to return to the hospital.  Obviously we united in what I might call “false cheer”.  “Oh, the tales that you’ll tell when you go back to school” etc.  Meanwhile I drove home in tears.  

But then we FaceTimed with him.  He was still in the ER as they waited for a room to open up for him.  He was hooked up to an IV and excited about all the machines.  He bounced up and down to show us how the machine showed his heart rate increasing and decreasing.  With sign language, he signed the whole alphabet for us, and showed us a drawing he did, and explained the complexity.  He shared how excited he is because he gets to go in an ambulance from one part of the hospital to another, and he gets to have an “overnight”.  

Talk about a lesson in perception.  I’ve spent the night in the hospital three times, twice for the birth of my children, and once for a lumpectomy.  I never greeted it as an “overnight”.  I’ve never been in an ambulance but I doubt I would have seen it as an adventure.  These last days dealing with the fear and sadness in the ups and downs of this with my grandson have been a huge lesson for me in how I might meet life now.  For one thing, all that matters is family, friends, connection, and perception.  Everything is so precious, every moment, exchange, breath. I’m precious too. Can I let myself feel that?

I still read the political news which is staggering, and yet surrounding that is the Love we share, the Love that is tangible and matters, and will carry us.  I don’t post photos of my grandchild but I have one here of him strapped in ready to go to the ambulance.  He has a huge grin on his face as he holds a small carton of milk. He’s wearing his Valkyries hat, and his Grinch pajamas because he loves Christmas so much he wears Christmas pajamas all year.  He’s my example of resilience, and how we meet what comes.  Life is an adventure.  Children show us the way. They give us Joy.